Tuesday, July 31, 2018

 Day 28    Long and winding road

Sometimes kindness comes in different directions. I have been the beneficiary  of a whole lot of kindness in my life.    I have recently heard the news of a friend who is having a baby boy near Christmas time.    When having a rough day either in the head or physically, hearing news of joy as well as sharing news which helps to brighten life up  is a wonderful way to spread kindness. I am happy today regarding the news of my friend. I think I may have learned a lesson about sharing in other peoples lives may lead to happiness in my life as well.

Monday, July 30, 2018

Day 27  Happy is as Happy does

I have little to say today.  I have witnessed a lot of pain and suffering from people related to me, people I have worked with and those I attempt to help.  In times of trouble, happiness can be elusive. I think this is normal although I wonder what drugs other then meditation that the Buddha or Dalai Lama had done in their lives.  Well not seriously.  I know that at times sadness occurs but maybe the object is not to stay or linger on the sadness.  Sometimes when I feel down and help someone else, it helps.   This gets my mind off of what I am feeling and thoughts having to do with me.  Maybe having an outward look can help with being happy.  I hope.

Sunday, July 29, 2018

Day 26   Animals on parade oh my

I was having a family discussion on why I was not a vet today.  I love animals.  They are easy to relate to and are easy to give unconditional love.  I have been bitten by animals and metaphorically by people.  The animal bites can be easier to understand the why and how come.   I have forced pills down my dog's throat in the altruistic notion that if he did not swallow it, he would be doomed with 3 months or less.  I have also pushed different unspeakable regions when boot scoot bootie time rolls around to save about 100 or more dollars.  Did I get bit, oh yes, I did.  Human bites as in an unkind word or an emotional issue which was never intended are more difficult to deal with.  I have tried to be more patient with myself and have tried to be bullet proof as in not taking things for granted.  I hope to work on this in the days to come.  Sometimes it may be better to look at life from a different point of view.  Buddhists try to let go of the ego.  Is it ok to do this all the time?

Saturday, July 28, 2018

Day 25    No Man Stands Alone

I watched a movie about how a group saves the world.  It could have been the Avengers, Justice League and then Ready Player One.   I believe that kindness is like this.  It cannot stand alone.  Jesus had his disciples, The buddha had his followers as well as Mohammed.  Moses helped form a religious nation.  The object of kindness does not live on it's own as it needs to be shared as in a communion between people.  I believe this.  May we all enter the game together to change the world for the better.  High 5.

Friday, July 27, 2018

Day 24   It's all how you look at it

Sometimes the mind can be a wonderful thing.  I can feel on top of the world when I think I have helped someone who thinks I am the brightest and kindest person they met.  Sometimes, it's not.  When someone may think that I ruined their life when I may not even know them very well, it sucks.  Regardless, I am not that much in the equations.  I am a small part of it.  Learning this and teaching myself this in moments of crisis helps.  Still kindness, I believe only triumphs when I can do this.  Sometimes I can't.  I have talked to others about cognitive behavioral therapy.   I have to re-enlightened myself on relooking at an idea or action at times.  Again, I live in my own world.  With the thought of looking at life as an observer,  I can survive.

Thursday, July 26, 2018

Day 23  Jesus loves me

I think this is one of the best songs to come out of the Christian religion.  Upon discussion with someone today, I was reminded of the need for all of us to be kinder to ourselves especially when we  may have made a misguided action or mistake.    I had worked years in hospice nursing and have found the knowledge of being in the present moment helpful.  It is hard.  Practice with saying kind words to oneself helps at least it helps me.  As I lay down to sleep, may the lord my soul to keep. 

Wednesday, July 25, 2018

Day 22  Keep Truckin'

Sometimes being kind is to take care of oneself.  It matters in life to meet one's needs and to pay attention to the body as well as mind connection.  Today, I am reminded of this as I struggle with feeling tired and sore.  I realize that I am the only one who can decide to drink more water or go to bed at an earlier time.  As I sign off tonight in the goal of self-care, I am being the kindness I can to myself and the world.  I have stated before to family and friends, "you don't want to see me tired." 

Tuesday, July 24, 2018

Day 21   Happy to be alive

I met somebody today who spoke of feeling great since he got up this morning able to walk and move on his own.  I think I can relate. Sometimes I think about just waking up and being able to breathe on my own as being a good day.  This thought may not have a lot to do with kindness, but in a way, I believe it does.  Sometimes when things look the bleakest it’s harder to be kind and generous with myself. I may focus on the things I can’t do or the things that I feel I don’t want to do. I may have feelings of fear or anxiety which again do you not promote happiness and kindness.  By sharing this simple statement, the gentleman help to brighten my day. I think by spreading this to others there may be less bleakness in the clouds.

Monday, July 23, 2018

Day 20   Be Kind To One Another  Ellen Degeneres

I have thought of this today after hearing someone special to me remind me of this saying with which Ellen ends her show every weekday.  She is right.  I find that kindness can be contagious as when I smile to someone, they usually will smile as well.  The Dalai Lama talks of smiling and being silly at the same time.  I think silliness is important to brighten a day or a laugh to make a sad mood happier.  I have found laughter in life as my best medicine.  Spreading it through a show like Ellen does or through just a simple thought said out loud can brighten up any mood.  It's like sun shining through the clouds. 

Sunday, July 22, 2018

Day 19  365 days is a long time

Starting a new adventure and having a year to do it in is a long time and commitment.  Sometimes, I find it difficult to always act in love and kindness to another.  It can wear after a while as not everyone as stated in a previous blog is looking out for another's well being.  Sometimes, kindness or the act of being nice to another is important in the grand scheme of who we are and what we believe.  I have met recently someone who can be very kind and loving and at another time can be very unkind and selfish.  When he is kind, he looks happy and relaxed.  When he is frustrated or focused on himself, he can appear arrogant or rude.  These acts can separate him from others by what seems a thousand miles.  What is the sense of a lot of material benefits if this leads to loneliness or sadness?

Saturday, July 21, 2018

Day 18   How to be kind

That is the question I ask today.  When I interact with others, I have the terrible habit of looking at life from the other person's point of view.  The Native Americans and Taoist or maybe the philosopher Confusius discussed the need to look at life from the other person's viewpoint.  In other words, one must walk in another person's moccasins in order to really understand the person.  Well, this could be a double edged sword if the other person was not a nice person.  How much do we help the other person?  Maybe it is in the understanding and in the kindness toward ourselves that we accept what is and then go on with our lives to be the kindest we can to ourselves.   We can offer friendship and help to those in need but with limits.   Do onto others as one would have them do unto you.  In all kindness, sometimes it is may be needed to follow a different path and spiritually follow a kinder direction may it be in life, work or family.  I thank my younger friends but wise non the less for help in this direction today.   I had rose colored glasses when young that everyone in the world wanted the same things, to be happy, to help each other, and to follow the golden rule.  I have since realized that this does not happen on itself.  I still have hope but know that the first rule is to be true to myself and from that grow.  The knowledge that in helping others, I grow, is the first step in the revolution that I believe is needed in our society.  I hope that we all can grow as a community, nation and world into a world in which we all can be proud. 

Friday, July 20, 2018

Day 17 Home

I have always found the thought of home being kept in the heart as a wonderful notion.  While watching Hallmark Christmas movies, home and family as the heart of Christmas happiness has made me appreciate family more.  The Bible discusses honoring your mother and father.  I am lucky as my mother is one of the kindness people I know.  My dog is a 15 year old old goat (well dog) who can be a royal prince or in other words a royal pain.  My kind mother has been taking care of him as we have been on vacation.  He has been getting her up early in the am around 4 am to be fed.  She has shown kindness to him and continues to laugh when discussing how she and he are no longer on speaking terms.  She has given a lot of people love and joy.  Sometimes being aware of this can be a source of happiness for both ourselves and others. 

Thursday, July 19, 2018

Day 16

Family is important in all walks of life.  I believe that our family either genetic or chosen is the launch pad to who we are and how we perceive the world.  Kindness and happiness, therefore, are integral to the family unit.  The Dalai Lama and Mother Teresa both discuss the importance of family to our world.  Mother Teresa stated that the way to change the world is in going home and loving our family.  Sometimes, issues or time can stretch that concept and make it difficult to achieve.  In the last few days, family time has become more important as I meditate on this notion of family and love.  I do wish to change the world for the better as happiness is something that we all should share in and enjoy.  May it begin with the ones I love and spread outward is my simple wish for today.

Wednesday, July 18, 2018

Day 15 WOW

Today I focus on the magestic sites at the capital and beauty expressed in knowing that we are all one country.  There was a movie shown prior to the tour.  It spoke of the sweat of African American slaves who built our capital building with their sweat.  It spoke of how we have grown since then with emancipation and now have busts of Rosa Parks and Martin Luther King Jr.  it talked about how we all come together as one in our country as Americans.  In this day and age, I believe the more we find similarities in ourselves with each other, the more we grow as a nation. The kinder we will become as well as our nation.  Goodbye Washington and the lessens you shared with me.

Tuesday, July 17, 2018

Day 14  Looking back and Ruff

Yesterday evening, I was able to spend time with my niece, nephew and his wife.  Sometimes when I was younger, I missed the happiness brought by a kind act of just getting together.  My niece, who is an inspiration and loving soul, brought up a great point about animals and kindness.  She loves dogs, cats and just about everything.  Dogs, in particular, are happy, loving and kind for the most part.  They respond to what they are given and will interact with love as they are shown love.  I agree with her as modeling our behavior likewise.  When we are kind and loving with each other (humans), we usually can get back the same.   I have always wondered what would happen if the world acted accordingly.  I think Jesus may have as well as I remember his words talking about this in the New Testament, but I digress.  Today, I am just thankful for the time together and happiness this brought. 

Monday, July 16, 2018

Day 13  How do I stay kind driving in DC?

If anyone has any thoughts, I would love to hear.  I drove yesterday and today did not even wish to see my car.  I am from a one or two traffic sign town in rural Virginia.  Growing up, the worse I dealt with was Richmond Virginia which has a few four lane highways but no roundabouts with four or five lanes and a google map stating to take the third right when the lane ended on the second right.  There are no cars which park where they wish, as lanes dwindle to nothing or are blocked with only waiting as an available option.  Today, my family and I walked and walked in order to get to the National Cathedral 2.4 miles away from the hotel.  On going back, we took a taxi with a very kind Jamaican born driver.  He was kind enough to drive us by the street where the Obamas live.  We talked a little about politics as he mentioned how we all come from a woman and was very kind in leaving us where we asked.  He could have overcharged us as other drivers who we asked prior to going to the cathedral quoted a rate of 15 dollars.  We paid less than 12.  He seemed happy, and I wish him to remain and grow in his happiness.  Today, I also felt a little happier meeting him.

Sunday, July 15, 2018

Day 12  Yogi

Today, I was able to do something very kind by spending time with my family and my adopted family.  The kindness shown by these two special people helped me immensely as we laughed, talked, joked and enjoyed each other company.  Another person not as close but dear also was able to take time out of her busy scheduled to be with us for lunch.  The one person, Yogi, has insight which helps to challenge as well as look at life and issues in different ways.  We appear to have gone through similar challenges in kindness.  The Dalai Lama speaks of our enemies as great teachers.  I have recently thought this but at some point, I believe something has to give.  To be kind to ourselves, I believe it can be difficult to put ourselves day in and day out in a harmful situation in which we experience selfishness to the point that we may suffer.  I don't know.  All I do know is my Yogi was able to get directions for the naval base in Annapolis.  He said it took a village to do that.  We did nothing but follow.  Sometimes, it takes a bright person and blind followers to get to the place they need.  As we arrived at the naval base, we saw where we were only a block away from the base to begin with and walked probably 1/2 a mile to get there.  Sometimes, it takes just good friends and laughter to get where we need in life.  Makes me smile just to think of it.  Lead on Yogi!! Lead on.

Saturday, July 14, 2018

Day 11 VACAY

Well today is a travel day for me and the family.  I have been tired and hate to travel.  I think of all I have to do prior to going and then when I get back home.  I have to get caught up with job work, house work, people work, pet work...  you get the idea.  As I walked down the aisle of a Cracker Barrel in Virginia, I started to think about enjoying the moment,  being present with family and traveling safely.  I started to think about the steps are what matter.  After eating and getting back into the car,  other thoughts crept in as I started to plan for the Monday in which I would get back to work.  My kind thought for today, may my family survive this travel with me and may I be thankful enough for the time together to enjoy it.  Wish me luck. 

Friday, July 13, 2018

Day 10   It takes a village....

Today was my last day prior to vacation.  I have been stressed as the normal person is and have been looking forward to getting away.  I have been thinking today of how both Buddha and Jesus needed time off to regroup.  Buddha left his family and sat under a tree until he fought his inner demons and found enlightenment.  Jesus left his family at some part and went to the wilderness to fight Satan and find his purpose.  I would say this was enlightenment as well.  At times, I believe being kind to myself (and others) have been to isolate myself during times of distress, conflict or fatigue either emotional or physical.  Today, I have to second guess this.  I find that others can help build me up and bring happiness in a laugh, in an effort to help, in a gentle word or in openness.  In this life, I doubt to be enlightened as Jesus or Buddha.  I hope that in my struggles to improve kindness in myself so that possibly I can help others with their own happiness.  I thank those today who have shown grace and kindness to me. 

Thursday, July 12, 2018

Day 9    Sometimes it is harder....

Letting go is a kind act, I believe, to both help ourselves and each other.  It is at times difficult for me to let go of a thought, idea, belief, etc....  Buddha spoke of meeting a buddha in the road and running him/her over.  Today, I am more aware of how this can affect my happiness as I can become stressed when I do not let go and hold onto feelings of self-righteousness, pain, anger etc.  I have read a book entitled Tuesday's with Maury which I highly recommend.  It is about a person with ALS, a terminal illness in which a person is unable to move, eat, and eventually has issues breathing.  During his months to year of loss, he allowed himself a half hour (I believe) to wallow in self-pity.  Sometimes like today, I find it important not to wallow and step out of the river of malcontent.  (Overdramatic, I know but like the word usage and symbolism. )   I wish sometimes, I could snap my finger and be all of a sudden enlightened in letting go.  Today, I continue the struggle and continue to hope. 

Wednesday, July 11, 2018

Day 8  Sometimes it is hard

The Dalai Lama, spiritual leader of Buddhism, talks about kindness as a religion all to itself and the way to be happy.  Sometimes, it can be difficult to know what the kind thing is.  I have had a past issue in which someone did something that was not kind to me and did not take into consideration my feelings.  I believe that we all have been down this road before in life.  I had tried to be kind to this person who acted inappropriately and became too friendly to the point of being uncomfortable.  I had set limits and attempted to walk a tight rope in this to prevent further embarrassment for us both as well as to help this person learn and grow from this.  I don't think that it worked.  Later, I found out that the person was overstepping boundaries again with other friends.  I do not know if by not speaking out  that she could get into a lot of trouble by what she did.  I do not speak anymore with the person.   I would like to yell at her to stop.  She has a lot to lose by continuing down this path.  I don't think she is happy.  It is hard to see people suffer as I have worked with people while dying and have seen both physical and emotional suffering.  I have experienced suffering but not at the point of the other suffering which I have seen.   At this point, it is hard to know the kind thing and what to do.  I have offered help but have not received acceptance in this.  At times, I think that it is like substance abuse or other disease.  In order to be able to help another person in kindness, the other person must accept this.  If they don't, it is hard to help.  Sometimes, maybe, the kind thing to do is to accept what is and let the other person live their own life. 

Tuesday, July 10, 2018

Day 7

"Do unto others as you would have them do unto you" - Jesus

I have thought about this for the past few days as I have been on the other side of words.  I don't think I have been alone as I know many friends and family members over my lifetime who have been ridiculed by another.  I have experienced being called fat, stupid and ugly in my life.  Growing up, I believed what I heard and have lived a large portion of my life either trying to prove these words wrong or trying to come to terms why another human being would try to hurt another human being.  In kindness to myself, I have tried to make sense of this over the past few days.  I had already came to terms with one person, my father, a long time ago.  Prior to his death, he asked me if he was a good father.  I told him "yes" as he had done the best he could with a limited up bringing himself.  I have been thinking of this over the past few days as I have been thinking of meaning of words.  Sometimes, I think that our words can become sharper than knives cutting into the flesh to cause pain.  Religions talk about this especially some eastern thought.  Words can bring us together or separate us for life.  Today, I have tried to be more thoughtful with my words and hope that I can continue to do so.  I had someone tell me that why should she be upset by what I said or what she said.  At that time, I tried to explain something I said, as I did not want her to perceive it in a different way than what I meant, which could be hurtful.  She had the habit of saying what was on her mind which did cause people to get upset and at times could cause strong emotions to flair up.   I don't agree.  The Dalai Lama talks a lot about the importance of words as does Thumper.  "If you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all."

Monday, July 9, 2018

Day 6  Words

"Better than a thousand empty words is one pregnant word, which brings the hearer peace"
- Buddha

I have been thinking today of the concert and how the words of the lead singer from Imagine Dragons influenced me and the crowd around me.  I was sitting next to a teenager, boy, and his brother.  Their Mom also was in the row.  During one of the songs, (My Demons, I believe), he stopped and started to talk about depression and mental health.  He started to say that he had dealt with depression.  After going to a therapist, he finally got the answer to why he felt the way he did.  I believe this gave him hope, and in his hope, knew that he could change.  He talked about liberation and owning who he was.  He seemed happy to me when he talked about it.  He was pumped up and excited the crowd.  The boy next to me yelled out "PREACH".  He was self contained with his hands crossed during the concert.  After this, he started to sing with the lead singer, pump his fists and clap with the crowd.  I wonder how many lives the young singer has changed with his words.  Today, I have tried to focus on mine.  At times, I have had to bite my tongue and reconsider what I was saying.  I felt like using my words today to defend my actions.  As I listened and tried to understand what the other person was saying, I realized it was not about my actions or me, it was about trying to solve a problem that the other person was having.  Another time, I became a little irritated by an action not being done.  I was about to become upset as "why wouldn't someone not pay attention to what I am saying and do it."  Again, it was not about me but a misunderstanding.  Today, I could not change the world like the lead singer of Imagine Dragons, but I felt a little less angry and irritated.  I felt, probably, a little happier

Sunday, July 8, 2018

Day 5  Words

I am a little tired today and have gotten back from the Imagine Dragons concert.  I enjoyed seeing the kindness shown to the audience and each other from the performers.  The first performer, Grace, spent several minutes in thanking the audience in humility and in pure enjoyment as well as the Imagine Dragons, for giving her the opportunity to sing her words.  She appeared to enjoy herself as she twirled onstage.  Her hair was adorned with flowers strung together.  Her feet had no shoes and appeared to float.  She spent several minutes thanking us for listening to her music and self-expression.
When the Imagine Dragons came onstage, the place exploded.  At the end of the performance, he thanked the audience by going up and down several aisles and giving high fives.  He had thanked his bandmates and then again the audience for listening to their words as well as music.  He also thanked the drummer's parents and sibling who were in the audience for giving them such as talented musician.  Listening to this, I could not help but smile.   I have thought about thanking others more at home, at work as well as friends who have supported me and have gotten me through tough times.  Through the kind words of the performers' thankfulness, I have realized how lucky I am as well as happier when I express how others' caring acts touch and lift me up. 

Saturday, July 7, 2018

Day 4    Taking a break

I was first going to name this blog, "Imagine Dragons" as that is the plan for today.  I will be joining my family going to a concert.  I am not too excited about this as I am older, have more issues with hearing and am getting to be a "fuddy-duddy".  In my office, I have a sign with a saying from Mother Theresa, "To change the world, go home and love your family".  Today, my kindness starts at home.  I feel happy when I am with the people I love.   So today, the plan is to "Rock On!!" 

Friday, July 6, 2018

Day 3  Indecision

Today, I have had issues on what to concentrate.  I had good intentions this morning, as I laid in bed prior to getting up to exercise on the Elliptical.  I was thinking that I would focus on kindness to myself and in letting go.  I have issues in letting go of thoughts and feelings which are difficult for me.  I have always been intense, especially in my opinions of right and wrong and in how we all should act towards each other.  I have been a Jesus fan growing up.  When he talked about turning the other cheek, doing onto others and giving up everything to follow him, I got excited.  Now, I have calmed down. Earlier, I would carry opinions and have intense feelings of indignation, regret, guilt or even  anger when someone would do something against my ideas of right and wrong.   When I say earlier, I mean a few weeks ago.  Due to being kind to myself, I have focused on letting this go.  I think that the great religious leaders and prophets, such as Buddha and Jesus Christ, didn't let things get to them too much.  Jesus did in the temple, don't get me wrong.  I think he did right since the priests were a bit (well a lot) hypocritical.   Buddha spoke of a monk who carried a woman across the stream with another monk accompanying them.  The monk who was younger and did not perform the act kept talking about the woman who did not thank the first monk for his kind deed.  He went on and on until the first monk said that he dropped the woman at the other side of the river, why couldn't he?  I am the second monk.  It does take a lot to change these opinions and outlooks.  It takes time.  It takes knowing when this is happening.  The benefits, I believe, are worth it.  These feelings can induce anxiety, which later can cause issues with elevated blood pressure, depression, poor health habits and dependency issues.   I have been on blood pressure medications due to anxiety in the past due to unthoughtful behaviors of others.  I have let what they do affect my health both emotionally and physically.  I am beginning to realize this now.  So on Day 3, being kind to myself has meant trying to let go of opinions and feelings related to how others act.  I cannot change them; I can only change me.  

Thursday, July 5, 2018

Day 2 and I haven’t given up yet.

I find it suprising that I am still trying to blog. I did say that I was a pessimist at the start although optimistic that something can come for my efforts. I have started the day on an optimistic note which is kind of scary at times.  Sometimes I feel that when I am optimistic the shoes will drop; something worse than I could never imagine would happen.   Now the more I think about it, the more I realize that part of being kind and happy is to be kind to myself. I’ve had issues with this in the past.  I don’t think I’m alone in this,although other religions,  like Buddhism, do not have the concept of self loathing.  How can we be happy when we are unkind to ourselves?   Today I made a step in trying to be more self-aware as well as thoughtful as to how I treat myself. Even though I could’ve hit the snooze button for another 30 or 40 minutes, I did get up today to exercise which usually makes me feel better.  I stopped to pet my dog Dexter who is 15 years old and a big part of my life.  Although I have not joked around as much today, I do feel OK.   I have done the simple things such as reaching out to family and friends just to say hi which does help me feel happier.   Their friendship and kindness helps pick me up when I feel blah.  Over the next few weeks in the blog I’m going to concentrate on that idea of how I can be more kind to myself.  So this is day two, trying to be more mindful of what it is to be kind, especially to me.

Wednesday, July 4, 2018

Day 1

My journey is beginning after discussing with a few friends that it would be wonderful to start a revolution of kindness and see how it can ripple throughout the world.  I have read the Bible, Buddha and works by the Dalai Lama.  I have also read the Tao de Ching.  I have experienced kindness in my life and have felt personally changed by it.  I have seen how rude words, thoughtless acts and self-centered focus can affect others and how we see ourselves.  I have seen how anger and hatred can change a place of work or a home.  I have seen how a simple smile can be contagious when someone was enraged about something of which I had no idea. I have seen how a laugh can bring us closer together and how a simple act of a gift can melt a heart.   I believe that these simple acts can be just as potent as the violent words and acts we have seen in the news and in our communities.   As I grow older, my hope for the world is that this simple act of starting a blog may begin the change.  This is my first step. 

Being smart

Being smart can be hard as the choices we make affect our happiness and eventually mold us.  We can choose to be happy by focusing on peopl...